Monday, January 2, 2012

HAIR

HAIR is a major source of aggravation for many women, myself included. Maybe it's because a woman's beauty is defined by her hair so the way our hair looks is always under a microscope.

For the past couple of months Summer has wanted to cut her hair boy short. I kept thinking like most of her wild ideas this idea would pass so I have been patiently waiting it out.

When I was younger my mother always insisted that I keep my hair short..for whatever reason. I always hated it and felt very naked when one more time I let her convince me of a super short cut my senior year of high school. I hated it and couldn't wait for the day for it to grow back out.

Confidence is something I've never had and to have very short hair was very exposing me. I felt naked and vulnerable. I used, and still use, my longer hair to hide behind.

In my opinion, two things have to be present for a woman to sport a short cut...confidence or true facial beauty...or just smart enough to know that a super short cut is the way to go for a busy, no fuss kind of woman.

When my daughter offered to pay for her own haircut out of her allowance if I would just take her to the salon, I knew she was serious. I reluctantly took her.

I cringed as I watched the stylest cut her hair off in wads and throw it to the floor.

Sometimes it's so hard to let your child be a separate individual from who you want them to be. Sometimes we parents tend to try and make their children miniature versions of themselves and their desires and when that is challenged it can be quite uncomfortable. But I sucked it up and let her express herself in a way that SHE felt most comfortable. From experience I know that whatever gets repressed will eventually be expressed.

So, it's been two days since her new "do". It's been more traumatizing for me than it has been her.

Sometimes experiences aren't always just for the person experiencing them. Sometimes the viewer is the "student".

She has been called as a lesbian, told she looked like a boy, and avoided because she looks so different from the way she did before and she still remains totally emotionally intact. I would have fallen apart.

It became obvious to me that my daughter is blessed with a lot thicker skin than I am and that what other people think of her hairstyle preference does not sway her decision on what SHE likes.

When I asked her if their comments hurt her feelings she said.."A little, but what they think really doesn't matter as much as what I think.".

Her thinking will serve her well in her future endeavors. I still struggle with being true to myself and my daughter has figured it out in only 10 years.

4 comments:

  1. Well I think Summer comes by her healthy attitude honestly...Her Mama is a 'take no shit' kind of gal too!!! Give yourself some credit!!!

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  2. Good for her! My sister had long, blonde curls and big blue eyes. I was a rather plain child with thin straight lackluster brown locks that my mother kept painfully short. No wonder I grew up thinking I was the lesser of the sisters. You should pat yourself on the back for raising such a self assured young lady!

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  3. Pictures for us that are far away??

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