Bright Ideas and New Beginnings

I get a lot of bright ideas, but few come to fruition. I usually end up deciding it's not such a bright idea after all, or realize the idea is too far-fetched to be attainable.

Moving to Austin 8 years ago was one of my "bright ideas" that I managed to convince Toby jump on board with. For the most part it has worked out. And what I mean by for the most part is I didn't really obtain an Austin address as planned. I got stuck 3 miles outside the city limits of Austin in a podunk town that inhabits all the Austin wanna-be stragglers and old timers (those who can't afford the Austin address) and up until recently, courtesy of a 12 mile drive to the nearest major grocery store.

Don't get me wrong, I have grown to love certain aspects of small town living. Hearing the coyotes howl on a quite summer evening, cows mooing in the distance, skies so free from ambient light you can see the Milky Way, plenty of nature to walk around practically at my back door, and my personal favorite, the awesome sunsets.

I also had expectations of Skye being part of a  homeschool community with endless participation, activity and friendships with kids with the same educational backround. It never worked out that way. Austin is such a large city and the groups are so splintered we had a hard time finding our place. Regretfully, in all our effort we never did and most likely never will before she ventures off on her own. As it's said, I guess it wasn't meant to be.

The upside is we did make friends with many different people so we have not been totally devoid of activity and friendship. And we also are pretty good at utilizing all there is to do in Central Texas so bored has never been a word that fit into our vocabulary.

I guess my point is things really didn't totally work out they way I had envisioned them which leads me to my next big question:

What are Toby and I going to do with the rest of our days as Skye moves quickly into adulthood and begins her own life adventure?

In the recent months, things have started to feel like a burden to me...keeping up with the yard, that damn pool, home maintenance, cleaning and maintaining a whole house that we only dwell in a small portion of, outrageous utilities, the tattoo shop, etc.

I feel change.

I can feel myself shifting into a different mentality and preparing for the next stage in my life.

Well, this time my bright idea is Toby and I live out some time in a travel trailer. It will enable us to be more mobile and free to visit family, do a little traveling around and also pick and choose areas we would like to eventually plant ourselves.

"Stuff" is no problem for us. 99% of the stuff we have serves no useful purpose anyway. It's just stuff that fills up the rooms of the house. Neither one of us are materialistic types and could easily live a simplistic lifestyle with bare essentials.

I hope this time my bright idea is closer to the vision I have in my mind and we don't end up penniless and homeless.

I still have plenty of time to research and plan.  A woman has the prerogative to change her mind.

Somwhere Stuck In Between

Many years ago, once I came to the conclusion that the Christian version or any of the other hundreds of different religion's idea of "GOD" was not my belief I began to sit back and try and figure out Who I was, Why I'm here...and my belief of Who/What I thought "GOD" is...or if I even believed at all there was the well known fictional character sitting high in the clouds holding all the cards and pulling all the strings.

These age old questions will probably always be there lurking in the back of all of our minds - even those that claim they know the way, the truth and the light are scared enough of death that you know even they must have doubts of what lies beyond this realm..if anything.

Over the past several years I have been on what I would refer to as an internal spiritual journey...a search for me, if you will. I have spent many hours reading a wide selection of books on the subjects of atheism, metaphysics, spirituality, and the origin of religion. I also have familiarized myself with an array of different House's of God.

In the end I have figured out that I never had to search very far. I came to the conclusion that what we all are searching for on the outside and beyond is actually very close to us....so close that it obscures our vision.

UPDATE: Ohhhhh...this was an interesting one. Even though this was drafted a few years ago, my thought process on my idea of God is still the same. Not that anybody cares, I'm pretty sure, but here it is anyway.

Until He Takes A Wife

As my last offspring is making her way steadily into young adulthood I often find myself thinking about the person I have transformed into from the experience of raising children. I reflect upon all the parenting mistakes I've made along the way and the heartache and guilt as a result of some of my decisions and actions.  I also relish in the satisfaction of all the things I obviously did right, all the joy, love and equally so the frustration my children brought to me...and the patience, yes definitely the patience.

Having both a son and a daughter, I am one of those lucky ones that have been able to experience the different relationship aspects that each gender bring to a mother.

As they get older I consider the relationship I have with each one of them.

In just a short few months my 26 year old son will be "Tying the knot".

We've always had a close relationship BUT he has never been what one consider a "mama's boy" nor would I consider me to be an overbearing or jealous mother.

Now that he has taken a fiance there is a different dynamic to our relationship. It's completely natural that all of his emotional availability should go to his wife to be.

I know this is what happens, and quite honestly it's what I WANTED to happen for him. I'm happy for him because he has found someone to share his life with.

It makes me think of the saying, " A son is a son until he takes a wife, a daughter is a daughter for life."

Although I'm far from religious, here is another one I remember having to memorize for my Bible class in high school:

Mark 10:7-8 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh.

When a man gets married there is another woman he has to make happy, and as every woman knows a happy wife makes a happy life.

In other words, there is a new "bitch" in town. :-)

Spliff

Today while channel surfing on this cold, gloomy January day, I came across a special on 60 minutes on the legalization of marijuana in Colorado. According to the special the legalization has had positive effects. Crime has gone down and the economy has been stimulated.

There has been much controversy over the legalization of marijuana. Currently, I don't smoke "weed" nor have I gotten high since way before the birth of my daughter almost 14 years ago...not that I can recall anyway.

Once upon a time I found great joy in smoking pot. I don't remember exactly the first time I ever smoked a "joint" but I do remember as an older teen spending many a weekend night in the early 1980's getting high with my best friend Anna at McNally Park.  Alas, those were the days when teens could hang out drinking beer and getting high in a park without being unnecessarily interrogated by the "Po Po". Freedom still reigned back then and we all managed to survive.

After getting high at the park we would then venture to the local McDonald's to order a .50 cheeseburger, and a large coke and fries. Was McDonald's GMO back then? Who knows. Those days we could eat a hamburger in peace without the fear mongers and health enthusiasts putting crazy ideas into our heads via Facebook and other various mind numbing news feeds.

After we we ordered our meal through the drive thru I would park my 1970-ish baby blue Dodge Demon facing the DI Parkway in order to be able to see what friends were headed to the park while we munched heartily on our grub laughing hysterically at our own lame jokes. Food never tasted so good nor was life ever more relaxed.

This was before the days of cell phones and texting. If you wanted to catch up with your friends you put yourself in the area you knew they would be or sought out a pay phone. It was always a hit and miss but it made life more interesting and challenging in regards to socialization.

Fast forward to my first marriage a couple of years later. Me and my husband Frank enjoyed partaking. It was our thing we did together to relax in the evenings. There was a little old black lady who lived down the road from us that sold joints for a dollar. Every evening after work Frank would drive down and get us one of Miss Hattie's joints and we'd smoke it while we watched a movie. Since I have never been a TV person pot always made sitting in front of the mindless TV more tolerable.

So how do I really feel about the legalization of marijuana?? I don't smoke it so I really don't have much of an opinion. Even though I'm a drinker, I do feel that on a general level smoking marijuana is the lesser of the two evils.

Why don't I smoke anymore? Because I don't want to get as big as a house in a munchie fest (bread and butter was my favorite), I have too many constructive things to do these days to feel "lazy", I don't need anymore bad habits that will eventually need to be broken, and the most obvious reason is my daughter is such a goody two shoes that she would probably turn me over to the authorities.

Sadly, I think most people have so much emotional baggage it's hard not to choose one or the other..or something even worse.

Oblivious

I saw something on the news the other day that was introduced as a positive story but I found it rather disturbing - and apparently I am the only one who did. Watch it here.

The story is about a couple in S. Carolina who hired a 22 year old female babysitter for their 7 month old son. After 5 months of this child being cared for by this babysitter the family dog began do snarl and growl at the sitter when she arrived. This alerted the parents there may be something amiss with the sitter and they put a recorder under the sofa to record the household happenings while in her care.

With their recording they uncovered the sitter's dirty little secret of cursing and slapping the child while he was whining.  I have no earthly idea why this surprises a parent when they find out about this sort of thing. Most of us as the flesh and blood of our 'little angels' lose it every so often (if we are honest about it) ourselves..some more extreme than others. Other than in rare cases there is nobody in this world that is going to treat and love your child like the little angel you believe they are.

Anyway, the story went on about how wonderful the dog (and pets in general) is that he had alerted the parents that something was amiss. All the responses were praising the pet for protecting the little boy from a potential threat therefore saving the child from a potential demise.

More than a couple of things bothered me about this whole story but here are my top two thoughts:

1. I'm pretty sure the dog was also getting his share of abuse - swatting with a broom, cursing at them with negative energy, or some other form of unloving reprimands. From my studies of dog behavior (and I've done plenty thanks to my nightmare rescue pet) I'm pretty sure the dog was concerned about numero uno. He was alerting the family that HE did not like the babysitter.

I must clarify I am a dog lover myself but I know that humans have a tendency to give our furry friends human characteristics. I notice it even more these days. It seems some very enthusiastic animal lovers are choosing animal/pet companionship over human connection. I will admit it's a lot easier to get along with most animals than it is humans, but is it not obvious that it's all part of our human emotional disconnect from each other?

Over the past couple of decades pets in our society are commonly taking the place of human relationships for more and more people. Heck, people will even allow their pets to sleep in their bed with them but the idea of allowing their child to curl up next to them in their bed and sleep is considered inappropriate.

It's nice to have a furry friend. I love mine very much, but he's a dog not a human. He deserves respect and love from his humans because he is a living being but he's not capable of being anything other than what he is...a dog. I'm not really sure who these people think are going to take care of them when they can no longer be the one doing the taking care. I can't envision Bo emptying my catheter bag or spoon feeding me while I'm on my death bed.

2. If this caregiver were in fact abusing the child I'm also pretty sure there should have been cues from the child. From my experience as a mother of two kids even very young ones have a way of letting us know of their likes and dislikes. Most likely the kid was giving the same cues the dog was but the parents ignored it or made excuses for his behavior by exclaiming he was cranky, teething, had separation anxiety or some other assumed reasoning????? Apparently they only paid attention when the dog was dissatisfied??

AND if you even remotely suspected that someone was abusing your kid what would make you leave them with them again??? What the fuck is wrong with people?

No wonder our nations children are running rampant and emotionally out of control.

HOME

Every now and then I have people ask me if I am ever going back 'home'. I find the word 'home' a contemplative word. Once you leave home it is no longer 'home'. It's a place you used to live. I consider the place you are living at the moment as home.

I always answer the question with true conviction and a clear and simple NO, I most likely will never be going home.

For this moment of now I am home. Only very extreme circumstances could ever force me to go backwards.

Besides, I just don't do that. Once I leave a place, person, or thing it's GAME OVER for me. I don't leave things, people or situations until I am 100 percent certain that I have no intention of going back. I believe in burning bridges. It ensures I will never go back to to something I felt the internal calling to leave in the first place.

Besides, you can't recreate the environment you left. I saw that my first trip back to Mobile after I had been living in Austin a year. Everything and everybody I had left was different...my family and friends, the city, the people, the roads, old neighbors had moved away.....yet, I felt that everyone could only remember and see me as the person who I was before I left.

Possibly because their surroundings didn't change. I was the one that left. I was the one that experienced change...different cultures and perspectives, made new friends, lived in a place where there were no preconceived notions about who I was or what was expected of me, learned what was truly important in my life by stepping out into the unknown, figured out who really loves me enough to keep in touch, and who I really love enough to keep in touch with...

All the memories I ever had of home were just that - memories. Not home.

You can't recreate the environment, because it's completely different. You can never go home again.

So, all the memories you have - of going to school, hanging out with friends, living with your family - are just memories. You can never re-live those times again in the same way you remember them to be.

You can't go home again because it's not there. Home is where you grew up, the people and places and events of your days there have changed just as you have.

'The stranger who comes home does not make himself at home but makes home itself a stranger.'

I Had To Laugh

This afternoon as I perusing my FB pages I came across this article "10 Most Terribly Overrated Destinations." in the Huffington Post.

In the half decade that we have lived in Austin (and most likely several years before we moved here) Austin has been recognized as being a great city to live in and visit for a number of reasons and has made it's way onto numerous "best of" lists from being the best city for families to best city for economic growth..and everything else in between.

I had to laugh after I read the article because as much as Toby and I love and call the Austin area and Central Texas our home we have often mused about the hype that Austin is given. I mean YES we love Austin because we love the outdoors and not only Austin but the whole Central Texas has more than it's share to offer for the outdoor loving family.

Austin is also and endless pit of opportunities which is beneficial for Skye and has certainly been beneficial for Toby and I financially. I have also grown to love Austin for reasons that aren't even on the "best of list".

All that said, I still don't understand all the hype for Austin to be a travel destination. I mean really, unless you live here Austin really doesn't have that much to offer for the traveler as far as attractions...unless you like to hang out in bar rooms with drunk college kids or hike, bike or boat.

All that said, I couldn't ever imagine myself living anywhere else and even the thoughts of  ever having to makes my heart hurt and my eyes water.

I Swear

Recently I saw this meme on Facebook that got me pondering....

Cursing is a daily practice for me. Cursing gives me comfort and releases my pent up anger and emotions and also helps me express myself.  I also consider myself a very honest and trustworthy person. In those very rare times I have ever felt desperate enough to lie, I wasn't very good at it. In addition, apparently  I give a trustworthy enough persona that my neighbor who barely knows me gave me the key to his house to care for his dog while he is out of town.

I was intrigued enough about this meme that I actually researched it a bit. I didn't really find anything with any concrete scientific backing.

Because using swear words is one of my favorite pastimes that has such a social stigma I have often wondered the origin of curse words. Who was it that designated a curse word a curse word?  From my research it's apparent that words change meaning over the course of time so what was a curse word back then may not be considered a curse word anymore. Who gets to choose our society's potty mouth?? It's all dumb and relative in my opinion.

My mother was a very Godly woman and very straight-laced but I can remember a time in my younger days my mother using curse words pretty regularly. Her favorites were "shit" and "God Damn" if you can believe that one. She used them mostly when she was on the phone chatting with her friends or in a bad mood. Strangely enough I never heard the word "fuck" come out of her mouth.

About the time I was around 11 or 12 mom went through a personal life change and converted us all to the Baptist faith.(we had previously been raised Catholic) It was around this time that she forbade herself to watch soap opera's anymore and replaced the curse word "shit" to "shike". My thought was if you are just going to replace the explicative with another word that was giving off the same vibe then what was the point? I never brought it up to her because I knew it would be futile but I did wonder about it pretty often.

I never heard the word "God Damn" come out of her mouth again. I vaguely remember the Baptist faith considering the word "God Damn" blasphemous...whatever.

I also notice kids these days use curse words more openly than they did when I was a kid. When I was young cursing was something you kept hushed. Of course Summer uses curse words openly around us because we use cursing as part of our everyday language. We had to teach her at a young age that cursing was not a socially acceptable behavior and she had to be careful who she used those bad words around.  I'm sure it probably confused her a bit when she was young but obviously she "gets it" now.

Either way, I will keep my curse words in order to keep my sanity....and my honesty.

The Truth Hurts

People don't like their beliefs to be compromised even when obvious facts are stated. They will cling to anything that gives them solice no matter how ridiculous of a story it may be.

Thanks to the media I'm pretty sure most of you have heard about the Sandy Hook School shooting (over and over again I might add) that sparked the gun control controversy. First let me give my stance on the gun issue...I really don't give a toot one way or the other about guns. We own a gun that's somewhere in the house and may or may not even work..in fact, I'm not really even sure what cranny of my house it's in at the moment.

Even if I had the unfortunate opportunity to use a gun I'm not sure if I could properly work it in an emergency situation. I've had only one experience with shooting a gun and I really didn't like it. It was loud and just holding it my hands made me nervous. In reality, I think the only instance I would ever really want to inflict personal damage to someone is if any one of my family members were in harms way. At that point I would hope my adrenaline would kick in and I'm sure it would turn out better than me trying to get a gun off safety and remember how to use it when in the moment of fear.

Okay now for the gist of my post. I saw this posted on one of my FB friend's status tonight:

Status: sharing some good advice from a friend
Merry Christmas to ALL my FB friends and GOD bless..P.S

You may not like guns and chose not to own one. That is your RIGHT. You may not believe in God. That is your choice. However, if someone breaks into your home, the first two things you're going to do is;
1. Call somebody who has a gun
2. Pray they get there in time

My response to the status: In this case wouldn't it be true that if I believed in God and prayer then I wouldn't need a gun in the first place? All I would have to do is pray for my safety from the all powerful god of choice and I would be protected from harm? I mean, isn't that the point of prayer?  In hopes that this God figure will choose to show us mercy when we ask for it? If someone really believes that they are protected by god then they wouldn't need a gun? Or is a pick and choose kind of thing with god so you better be prepared just in case god was not at his desk when the prayer was called in??

Her response to my post: leave it to you Laura to come back with something negative about our creator........I'll say an extra special prayer for you tonite, love ya girl & you have a happy holiday......lol ☺

I let it go after her response, but what my ego really wanted to respond back and tell her that maybe she needed to throw in an extra prayer for her safety against the bad guys so she could sleep peacefully tonight and to tell her that she was probably obviously offended by my post because sometimes the truth hurts.

First off, there was nothing negative in my response to her post. I stated obvious facts. Secondly, it's apparent that those many religious people who have offered up prayers for me in the past for my lack of belief in their deity must have fallen on deaf ears....hence, the ineffectiveness of their condescending prayers.

At least I live my life without being disappointed by a prayer that wasn't answered and I rely on my own sense of what is right or wrong. My power is mine and only mine. I don't give it away to some fantasy character created by man to manipulate man.

You may ask what I do without a belief in a God. It's really very simple.

I gather my strength from how I view the world and people around me, from my experiences and the practice of making better choices with each mistake I make. Learning to live in the moment and in moments of tragedy, loss or death to deal with them by stepping away from my grief and knowing that this too shall pass. By embracing my time with my family, friends, and neighbors.

It's all very simple without a middle-man.

Choices

We all have choices. When somebody says they "Have No Other Choice" what they really mean is that the alternative is not an option they are willing to take.. The question is, are we willing to make a choice based on the consequence it may or may not produce??

There is always a choice. The question is just what is the best choice/alternative.

The Bullet

Several months ago Toby and I watched the documentary Hungry for Change. I believe eating healthy is important and even though I have a taste for fast food and cokes I try hard to limit my intake. I also don't mind the taste of  most veggies and fruits so it's pretty easy for me to eat healthy...no need to have to drink my veggies and fruits like suggested in Hungry for Change.

Toby on the other hand took the documentary to heart and suggested we buy a juicer. I really wasn't all that on board about it all because (a) I have very little counter/cabinet space in my kitchen to house something that someone may bore of in a few months. (b) I didn't want to spend that much money on something that may be a passing fancy to someone.

I remembered at one time, my neighbor went on a juicing binge but hasn't used her juicer in a couple of years so she offered us her old juicer. It was not an el-cheapo but it wasn't a higher end one either. Needless to say it didn't last long after we got it before it had to go to juicer heaven.

For a couple of  weeks after the juicer death I reviewed the many different brands and styles of juicers that ranged anywhere from $100-$500. It was an exhausting task.

Toby was really enjoying the juicer and used it daily to make juices so he was missing having one. Quite honestly, I hated the thing because it was loud and hard to clean. I was secretly glad when it died. I'm so frugal I HATED seeing all the pulp that got wasted on juicing. It just looked like money being poured down the drain to me. My thought was I could have eaten that! I also noticed how many veggies it took to make a small drink. Even though Toby had been really enjoying the juicer I made no attempts to quickly replace it hoping he would eventually forget about juicing.

One day he saw an advertisement for the NutriBullet. I was impressed because it was reasonably priced and because it breaks it all down into a liquid there is NO WASTE. We did some reviews on the Nutribullet and decided it would work for our needs.

Toby makes him a couple everyday and takes them to work and I just recently have began to make me one a day. It's a perfect way to get your quota of veggies and fruits.  We use mostly kale, spinach, celery, carrots, banana, strawberries, mango, apples, broccoli, blueberries, oranges, pineapples, peaches, flax seed, and almonds. We try to change it up as much as possible trying different veggies and fruits.

When we first got it I was reluctant about using it because the color of the drink is not appealing, but they actually can taste pretty good depending on combination of veggies and fruits you use.

I'm not really one to promote merchandise unless it really deserves it but I have to say this thing is super sturdy and breaks the food down enough that it has the texture of a smoothie with very little to no pulp.I also love that it's relatively quite and super easy to clean.

If you are looking for a cheaper alternative to a juicer I highly recommend the Nutribullet. We got ours at Target for $100.

Cheers!

Unusual Minorities

The other day I ran across an article that could have been written by me.  I'll summarize the article with the points that resonated with me the most.

Yes, I'm still a secular homeschooler; and yes, I'm aware that this is a minority position. But there's something degrading about the idea of begging the mainstream population for forgiveness: "It's okay! I'm not like those homeschoolers!" And there's something misleading about saying that it's unusual to be a secular American homeschooling parent, when the larger truth is, it's unusual to be a secular American parent, period.

I can't tell you the times I have dreaded telling someone we homeschool for fear they will assume we are religious. In the past I use to make the mistake of automatically telling people we were not religious. I don't know what was worse to let them believe we were "sinners" or to tell someone who is religious that we are not and watch them glare at me with a concerned furrowed brow. I learned to just keep my mouth shut. Matter of fact, nowadays I avoid the subject all together and just let people I know we will never see again believe my kid is traditionally schooled. Better that than be viewed as one of those "weird homeschoolers".

The majority of Americans are Christians -- 78.4%, according to the latest Pew report. About 16% of the rest are "unaffiliated." Which sounded like good news to me, the big fat scary atheist. But in fact only a tiny minority of the unaffiliated identify as either atheist or agnostic -- 1.6% and 2.4%, respectively. The rest are happy to consider themselves as "nothing in particular," and those whatever-dude types are about evenly divided between secular-whatever and religious-whatever.
This still makes people like me a minority within a minority.

He hit the nail on the head when he said.."Minority within a minority". That's what we are. Not only are we not religious homeschoolers we are not religious PERIOD. That's two strikes against us already.

The idea that the homeschooling community is a religious body is as incorrect as the wistful assumption that public schools are entirely secular.

I had never thought about that before until I saw it on paper. With the exception of my atheist neighbor the rest of my mainstream neighbors would be considered religious in some fashion or another even if it's not readily practiced or broadcasted.

On the other hand, if you're a secular homeschooler in the Bible Belt, you may have to do some serious searching to find another of the "unaffiliated." But that's not because you're homeschooling. That's because you live in a place where the phrase "Nice to meet you!" is pronounced "What church do y'all go to?"

I had to laugh at this one. When I lived in Mobile more than just a couple of times I had people automatically ask me what church I attended upon introductions. Luckily, it's a little more diverse and progressive here so nobody assumes anything.

Homeschoolers are neither more nor less likely to be Christian conservatives than are their mainstream counterparts. Or, to put it more simply: Most American homeschoolers are Christians, but only because most Americans are Christians.

All that being said, I used to really stress about not finding a homeschooling circle for Summer but you know what? I have found that because of our non-religious beliefs and restrictions we mold well with most people we come across, both religious and non-religious. We have no expectations and we go with the flow.

 In turn, that has made us able to be ourselves and enjoy our surroundings as a whole experience and certainly none of us are lacking in friendships or activities.

If you are interested here is a link to the whole article.

So Close, But Yet So Far Away

A little over a decade ago, once I came to the conclusion that the Christian version or any of the other hundreds of different religion's idea of "GOD" was not my belief I began to sit back and try and figure out Who I was, Why I'm here...and my belief of Who/What I thought "GOD" is...or if I even believed there is the widely accepted fictional character sitting high in the clouds dangling the unknown appearance of a "savior" over your head at all. Just writing down those words make it sound all the more ridiculous...

These age old questions will probably always be there lurking in the back of all of our minds - even those that claim they know the way, the truth and the light are scared enough of death that you know that even they must have doubts of what lies beyond this realm - if anything. You don't fear something you understand or are confident about.

In my internal spiritual journey...a search for me, if you will, I have spent many hours reading a wide selection of books and watching documentaries on the subjects of atheism, metaphysics, spirituality, and the origin of religion. Knowledge is power and as it is said.."take what you can use and leave the rest."

Since cutting my ties with religious dogma I am free of those rituals, manipulations, and contradictions that bind you to fear and unrealistic life expectations.

Ironically, without a belief in the religious version of God, I am a much more joyful person and am slowly learning to love myself and others more genuinely with each passing day. I can now FEEL love. I can now FEEL compassion. I can now FEEL. My FEAR is gone.

In the end I figured out that I never had to search for my idea of "God" very far at all. I came to the conclusion that what we all are searching for on the outside and beyond is actually very close to us....so close that it obscures our vision.

What?

Recently on Facebook I came across a video that really got under my skin. Apparently a father has issues with his 15 year old daughter and decided to solve the problem via You Tube.

Here is the video if you have not seen it yet...



I can't figure out if this video bugs me more because the majority agrees with the parental tactic or the fact that the guy really really thinks this tactic will work in a postive way. If the latter is true, no wonder his daughter behaves the way she does.

I have to say that what strikes me most is that he's smoking a cigarette, littering and complaining about her cursing when he curses and then the gun?! I also have to say that the fact he did the video and broadcast it as opposed to sitting down and talking to her face to face speaks loads about how screwed up things are in this family. I end up feeling sorry for them all.

Maybe she's spoiled and not dealing well with all the angst of a teenager in an already broken home, (there was the reference to Mom and Step Mom), but this wasn't the answer. This public embarrassment is something she may never be able to understand or get over. He's made this about him, not about how to reach her and make her understand. It's look at me, the IT Dad posting a video where I shoot up a lap top.

Maybe that's where some of her selfish attitude comes from.

To me it's always the hardest part of being a parent is to know that most of not all of what you wish your kids didn't do, you do too, and you'll never make things better for them unless you are trying to fix you too.

In all honesty, whatever issues he has with his daughter began as a seed years ago when she was a toddler. It all just manifested and reared it's ugly head in her teen years. This problem didn't just begin...it started years ago and he just didn't notice it until it got big enough to fester.

Poor guy. He's in for a long road ahead...

A Day in the Park

With all the stress of moving and relocating for the past couple of months, Toby has managed to get a bad cold virus. With Toby being sick and not feeling well, we have not been able to do much sightseeing. The good news is, the weather finally warmed up a little here in Austin so Summer and I have been able to venture our new neighborhood a little bit.

The other day Toby said, "I feel like this is somebody else's house it's so nice". I agree totally. People walk around the neigborhood walking their dogs and strolling their babies. Kids play in their yards and don't roam the streets unattended. There is no drug dealings on the corner and noone roaming the streets for no apparent reason other than to "mark their territory".

Since Toby was still feeling under the weather today, Summer and I decided to take a trip to the local park. It's not even a mile from the house, so it's very convenient for us. It was sunny and very warm today, so I took my camera for some photos. The park is very, very large. Here are several that will give you an idea of what the area is like.








And before I moved to Texas, I thought Prickly Pears were something you only found being sold in the Walmart garden section. These things grow everywhere around here. They are like weeds here.



Anyway, I know I haven't posted any of the pics of the inside of the house, but I can't seem to manage to get any pics that show the actual inside of the house...they only seem to be showing my furniture, and that's not a pretty picture!

Some Things Are Better Left Unoticed

Although I love my new home, there are a couple of things that I don't embrace.

I still really HATE the way the people drive around here. It's very fast paced and seems as though everyone drives with a lead foot. They don't really drive recklessly...just very fast. I still have not driven yet. I am a very pokey and a careful kind of a driver....like an old lady. Speaking of old people, now I know why I haven't seen many. They would never survive on these city streets! I'm sure that most of the old people must live on the outskirts of Austin. Smart move old folks. :-)

Since the weather had warmed up yesterday, we took a stroll downtown. Austin's downtown is a lot bigger than Mobile's, but not as charming. Mobile's downtown seems more personal and inviting. It would take weeks to see and do all the things that Austin's downtown has to offer.

Anyway, as we walked around we found this really cool park downtown. It's called Waterloo Park. By the looks of it I thought I had found paradise on earth. It seems though that someone already owned the park....homeless people. I can't believe that a park that cool would be allowed to be inhabited by numerous amounts of transients. They even have all their belongings stored there...blankets, boxes to lay on, etc. It's not like they don't have a very large Salvation Army and homeless shelter down there to house and feed them. Anyway, if you can look past all the urine odor and people laying all over the benches it was pretty cool.

There are also peddlers on most corners of the downtown area. I don't believe these people are homeless I just think there are a few people in Austin that make their living collecting on people's generosity.

Today we met up with Ginny at the same bar/restaurant playplace for lunch. After further studying the place it's even nicer than what I thought. There's a few restaurants that back up to this huge playground. So no matter where you eat/drink there is a playground to entertain your kids.....what an invention!

We have began to mold to the motel and "accept what you cannot change". We are still anticipating that wonderful day when we close on our house and have a real home.

Reasons to Love Austin

The first and foremost is that they have a homeschool convention here! I have always wanted to attend one of these curriculum fairs but there were never any close enough to me to warrant attending.

Hmmmm......how do I say this in a nice way? Well, in public play places the kids don't run you over or "take over" and trash the place so that no one else gets to enjoy it either. Don't get me wrong, there are demon children everywhere, but they are kept to a minimum here.

There is not near as much trash thrown all over the roads/highways. And the fast food restaurants aren't scary to eat in.

The weather is much like Mobile's but with one difference. There isn't as much humidity in the air which leads to super dry skin and fly away hair. I don't really like this aspect right now, but I have the feeling once the weather warms up this will be a plus.

The men around here don't leer at you here like they do back home either. They are very polite and they don't stare and act like dogs in heat.

The people around here seem to be very intellectual and educated. They have a plan of action and strive for more...but yet they know how to enjoy life too. They are also very health and environmentally conscious too. There are a lot of places to walk, bike and do outdoor things around here, which is probably why you don't see the obesity problem here that you do back home. I'll have no excuse for my gut living here.

Although most of our stay here has been bliss, (except for the motel room) the hispanic influence is strong here and if Toby and I don't take up a spanish course we will continue to look like idiots. Even when they do speak english, it is so broken that we both have a problem comprehending.

I'm hoping that Summer will make a little latino friend and learn some spanish along the way. Being young, I'm sure she will pick it up quickly.

Oh, and the worst thing of all. They don't have a Books-a-million!