Solitude

Sometimes I get caught up in what's not going the way I want it to or what I'm NOT doing that I want to do. I know this is a big NO NO but somehow I always let myself get caught up in the pitiful me mode.

This is one of the things I strongly dislike about myself. I don't go with the flow well. I have an agenda and I like to keep true to it. I get very agitated and cranky if I'm not able to do the things I want to do when I want to do them.

In all honestly, I probably have more faults than the average person. I have to work really hard on changing my attitude about things that happen around me that I can't change all while keeping my chin up and a smile on my face.

Recently I have found that it helps when I get out and about by myself every so often even if it's just to the grocery store. I am a solitary person by nature and enjoy being by myself...sort of odd for a person that doesn't really like herself...maybe I like myself more than I think...

I used to have a friend that hated to be by herself. She always sought out human companionship even if they weren't the best company. Her motto was better to be with someone bad than nobody at all.

I think that's one of the things that Toby and I have most in common. Even when we first dated and newly in love we would spend time separated and didn't mind it.There were times that we would be together in the same house content with being in separate rooms doing our own thing without feeling the need to be with each other. I think that may be the reason why we get along so well now. Neither one of us are needy. We enjoy each other's company but we aren't insecure without each other. I think that same concept spills over into my kids. As much as I love having them around, I don't feel out of sorts when they aren't around.

Don't get me wrong. I do enjoy the company of friends and family when they are around and I do seek out companionship with them, but I also don't mind being alone and prefer being by myself rather than with people.

Why do some people feel the need to be social? Take Sum for example. She loves being with people anytime or anyplace, whether it be her friends, or me and Toby. Her goal each day is to find social outlets whether it be chatting online or having friends over to play. Even my dog seems to follow suite with the social thing. He follows us from room to room and freaks out if we leave him alone.

So my question is is sociability something that is inborn or are introverts created by some outward experience/s??? Why do some people prefer solitude and others feel the need to be around other people???